♥ Thursday, June 17, 2010
I just really wanna get this fucking cheebye things out of me .
Have you ever felt like , whenever you need some one to talk to , Really need , there's no one to talk to ? Your friends just turn away , and don't give a fuck about you . Yea, FRIENDS . Like this you can call friend uh ? Even your dam bestfriend, wouldn't give a damn . Like you wanna talk about things like, things that is bothering you , then your best friend just try to change topic .
- What th fuck ? Yup , that's why I started talking to my pillows and soft toys .
'Cause people just turn away , when i seriously need a listening ear .
Whatever , call me weird, call me stupid , call me dumb, call me retard .
I talk to myself , i talk to my soft toys, I talk to my dog , I talk to my plants, I talk to my everything .
Zi bi zheng , <--- I got zi bi zheng . yay stay away from me . :l
Remember ? I once locked myself in my room th whole week , without eating, yes i did ate some snacks . Without bathing, too . Call me dirty , whatever . Why did I lock myself in my room ?
-Everyone neglected me . A lot people hates me . People thinks I'm scary .
boohoo ? And then , Some times I really wanna get things out of me , but i have no one to talk to .
So I started talking with my soft toys . Don't think 'I thought that you can talk to Fatema'
C'mon that was Holiday , I can't contact her phone and she's away .
But she was th only one that always, ALWAYS cheers me up. Despite th fact that I'm really really not a good friend.
I tried to be .
I was just being friendly , and then people start to misunderstand me . People think I'm trying to get attention . And then hate me .
Am I just being over-kind over-friendly ?
Maybe i should really stop being kind and friendly , I was actually , a very bitchy girl Fyi (:
Remember those times that I scold people for no reason at all , vulgarities here and there . Fighting . Maybe i should be like that again (: - This sentence , i said a lot of time but i didn't do it . Cuz when I start to become rude, my friends will be like 'are you okay?' 'you seem very weird'
Tell me what the fuck should i do ?!
I do this wrong , i do that also wrong . What people want from me bodoh ?! I angry , people misunderstand me say I hate them . I angry with myself I SERIOUSLY IS BEING ANGRY WITH MY STUPID IDIOTIC RETARDED SELFFFF . I really gonna suffer from depression soon seriously . Everyday in room cry cry cry cry . Also useless! Do you all know , i fucking have feelings too . I GET HURT EASILY . AS EASY AS ABC . YOU SCOLD ME 1 WORD I ALREADY VERY UPSET . PLEASE STOP LOOKING AT MY CHEEBYE BITCH FACE AND SAY I ANGRY WITH YOU ALL DAMN IT . IM BORN LIKE THAT MY FACE VERY USED TO LIKE THAT WHAT THE FUCK YOU ALL WANT .
My parents say I very rude to them because of my face! THEY GIVE BIRTH TO ME WITH THIS FACE WANT ME DO WHAT BODOH . SERIOUSLY LAH FUCK MY LIFE. Tears really can't stop rolling down my face. Tsk whatever lah , no one will understand.. I really feel like dying , im not being emo or whatever, laugh at my life people , laugh..
Expectation , give me an expectation ? It'll only turn out to be disappointment.
It's like only Fatema understand me , and leffy . Thanks, you guys (: ..
Fatema cries whenever i cry , haha.. thanks Lol (:
Have you ever felt like , whenever you need some one to talk to , Really need , there's no one to talk to ? Your friends just turn away , and don't give a fuck about you . Yea, FRIENDS . Like this you can call friend uh ? Even your dam bestfriend, wouldn't give a damn . Like you wanna talk about things like, things that is bothering you , then your best friend just try to change topic .
- What th fuck ? Yup , that's why I started talking to my pillows and soft toys .
'Cause people just turn away , when i seriously need a listening ear .
Whatever , call me weird, call me stupid , call me dumb, call me retard .
I talk to myself , i talk to my soft toys, I talk to my dog , I talk to my plants, I talk to my everything .
Zi bi zheng , <--- I got zi bi zheng . yay stay away from me . :l
Remember ? I once locked myself in my room th whole week , without eating, yes i did ate some snacks . Without bathing, too . Call me dirty , whatever . Why did I lock myself in my room ?
-Everyone neglected me . A lot people hates me . People thinks I'm scary .
boohoo ? And then , Some times I really wanna get things out of me , but i have no one to talk to .
So I started talking with my soft toys . Don't think 'I thought that you can talk to Fatema'
C'mon that was Holiday , I can't contact her phone and she's away .
But she was th only one that always, ALWAYS cheers me up. Despite th fact that I'm really really not a good friend.
I tried to be .
I was just being friendly , and then people start to misunderstand me . People think I'm trying to get attention . And then hate me .
Am I just being over-kind over-friendly ?
Maybe i should really stop being kind and friendly , I was actually , a very bitchy girl Fyi (:
Remember those times that I scold people for no reason at all , vulgarities here and there . Fighting . Maybe i should be like that again (: - This sentence , i said a lot of time but i didn't do it . Cuz when I start to become rude, my friends will be like 'are you okay?' 'you seem very weird'
Tell me what the fuck should i do ?!
I do this wrong , i do that also wrong . What people want from me bodoh ?! I angry , people misunderstand me say I hate them . I angry with myself I SERIOUSLY IS BEING ANGRY WITH MY STUPID IDIOTIC RETARDED SELFFFF . I really gonna suffer from depression soon seriously . Everyday in room cry cry cry cry . Also useless! Do you all know , i fucking have feelings too . I GET HURT EASILY . AS EASY AS ABC . YOU SCOLD ME 1 WORD I ALREADY VERY UPSET . PLEASE STOP LOOKING AT MY CHEEBYE BITCH FACE AND SAY I ANGRY WITH YOU ALL DAMN IT . IM BORN LIKE THAT MY FACE VERY USED TO LIKE THAT WHAT THE FUCK YOU ALL WANT .
My parents say I very rude to them because of my face! THEY GIVE BIRTH TO ME WITH THIS FACE WANT ME DO WHAT BODOH . SERIOUSLY LAH FUCK MY LIFE. Tears really can't stop rolling down my face. Tsk whatever lah , no one will understand.. I really feel like dying , im not being emo or whatever, laugh at my life people , laugh..
Expectation , give me an expectation ? It'll only turn out to be disappointment.
It's like only Fatema understand me , and leffy . Thanks, you guys (: ..
Fatema cries whenever i cry , haha.. thanks Lol (:
Ebellll .
